That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize