I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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