your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
