mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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