i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican