I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
