My friends, they love my intelligence
I just pynch a tree in the face
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
This is my gift to your gina
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong