You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.