Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
