There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I need water and some morals
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
