i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
