My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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