fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
You can't special order awesome
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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