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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.

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• (516): View more from New York

  you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.

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• (315): View more from New York

  Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  this is not a drill

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.

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