He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
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