you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
If I die, sorry about rent.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize