You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
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He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
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Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Someone came in the potted fern
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize