I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Send help, water and tortillas.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.