Are we in a gay sports bar?
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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