I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
