Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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