nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize