i jhust puked up my retainher.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
