it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize