she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
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