Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
