He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i was born a porn star she said
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
