just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Randomize
