Please don't use social media to get back at me.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.