My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
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