Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i may or may not be watching the land before time
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
