Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
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I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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