i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
