well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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