Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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