You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
