one might say we're banned from that church
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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