She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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