Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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