just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
