well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
