I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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