it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
