I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Randomize
