Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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