i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
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