I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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