Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
