I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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