With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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