no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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